Sunday, March 18, 2012

Dikhta nahi hai kya!

Who says Indians are not united? After traveling to almost 6 different cities within a span of three weeks, this is one thing that I'm very sure is not true. Wherever there is anything remotely connected to rules, we have an itch for breaking that. After all what are rules made for, if not for breaking!!

Traffic signals are meant to be jumped, seat belts are supposed to be kept behind the seat and helmets....don't get me started on them. Of course they are supposed to be worn on your hands or even better kept on your bike handle!!!! Which idiot came up with the idea that it should be worn on head! If you have a bike, you are supposed to check the speeds to which it can go and do all the possible stunts on a crowded road. So what if triple riding is illegal? We'll go one step ahead and ride with four of our friends with none of us wearing our helmets. Let us see what Bollywood action directors have to say about that!

If you are driving a truck or bus, you obviously own the road and you have the right to keep honking till the other person makes way for you even if he has to park on the side for that. If you are driving a car, you are of course above bikers and cyclists as per Indian Road Hierarchy and you have the right to take your own sweet time to take decision and give indicator at the last moment and if the other motorists did not see that, well it's their own fault.

Then we come to the auto drivers...the true followers of worldwide action heroes! They can make snakes blush by their talent to zigzag out of any kind of traffic. They have the ability to look left and drive to the right. If you ever feel like going to an amusement park for a thrilling ride, don't go and waste your money there. Just go for a ride in one of these autos, they will literally give you a "out of the world" experience. But the "best" experience I had was when our cab driver opened his door while driving at approximately 50 km/hr and turned outside to spit without once giving any indication!

However, the best things are always saved for the last! And none of the above can beat the kings of our roads, the pedestrians. They can stop in the middle of the road and turn to call out a friend who is walking on the other side of the road without any fear of the vehicles. Well, if the drivers don't want to get beaten up by public or arrested by police they will move themselves. There is no concept of zebra crossing, in fact there is no such thing in the world. Why waste your time waiting for the signal to go red? Just show your hand and move ahead or even better just jump out of thin air and make a dash for it. And if a motorist dares to come in your path just shout at him "dikhta nahi hai kya". They have amazing gymnastic  and athletic talent, jumping over road dividers, running through a busy thoroughfare among many other hidden ones.

It's a real irony that rules have to be enforced and fines have to be paid by people for not following them when they are meant for their own safety.